So how does delayed gratification work out for your good? Ultimately it increases the enjoyment and appreciation of the gratification once achieved. It also gives you the satisfaction of knowing that you passed over something good, in order to have something better.
This is very hard to do in relationships. We so quickly get attached to people, ex-boyfriends or girlfriends, new crushes, best friends. We also have in the back of our heads this false notion that if we don’t get married quickly we’ll run out of options. Put these two together and we often find ourselves settling for something that we probably know in the back of our mind is not best.
Why would this be a concern for us? Can’t enough hard work and dedication make any relationship a good one? Hardly. Its people who have not delayed their gratification long enough, who often preach this myth. Unfortunately there are some people you will never be able to work hard enough to please.
Another benefit of delayed gratification is that it keeps us from that nagging feeling that we could have had something really great if we had just waited.
Another reason why delayed gratification can be beneficial is that often while we are busy chasing now we fail to notice the beauty we are passing by. We may be so wrapped up in what makes us happy at the moment that we ignore someone who could make us happy for life. We might be so infatuated with now that we blow off someone who would still be there tomorrow.
Insecurity is (once again) a big reason people don’t delay gratification when they should. Girls often see this hunk of a guy as the solution to their need to be wanted and accepted. But their actions with him may seriously put off a less dominant guy who is actually a better match for them.
Guys often feel like they are not worthy of the woman they really want. When in reality, the only thing pushing her away is all the time they are spending with now, instead of with her.
My advice? Enjoy the moment. Don’t worry about what other people think. Don’t worry about upholding your reputation with one person, it only tarnishes with another.
But . . . do think about the future. If you see something great don’t ruin it by chasing something good. Remember now satisfies you tonight, but might not be there next week. Use discretion in friendships and relationships with people whom you don’t see a long-term future with. Don’t base relationships on how long you think they will last, but gage their worth and adjust your time accordingly.